How to deal with backstabbing colleagues. Backstabbing colleagues are there everywhere in the workplace. Ways and means to deal with a toxic colleague who is backstabbing.

The co-worker takes the credit for your work. The manager forgot to invite you to a meeting — but blames you. The office gossip lets it slip that you came to work hangover.

Sound familiar? Then the chances are you are dealing with an office backstabber.

Holding onto a job right now is very tough. Mix in a backstabbing colleague, and it could get even tougher.

Making friends in the office is a great idea, as long as they are people you can trust and respect. When you can’t get along or have an uneasy feeling about a co-worker or a group of them, it can make an already busy schedule more stressful.

What can you do if you feel an office backstabber is hurting you or others? How can you identify the office snake?

• They will be the one who is seeking to undermine and sabotage you, your reputation and your career at every turn.
• He will be the one who is spreading rumours about you.
• She or he will be the one putting you down to your boss behind your back.
• They will be the one stealing credit for your ideas

How can you deal with the situation before it gets out of control? Here is how to stop the damage without becoming a part of the problem.

How to stop backstabbing colleagues before the situation gets out of control?

• Keep yourself cool

You may want to hit back once you have been bombed with backstabbing, but this reaction may produce an unwanted cycle of events. Backstabbers aren’t going just to let retaliation go. While it is tempting to get back at that person, resist the urge to engage in their games.

• Call out bad behaviour without being confrontational or defensive

You may feel the instinct to avoid the person and create a safe distance. Even though our gut instinct to stay away from them, that usually doesn’t work. So, ask the backstabber to validate their behaviour. Be objective and say you have observed particular action, such as cutting you off during meetings and ask why.

• Write it all down

Don’t just run to your boss with your woes and start babbling. Have concrete, written proof that a colleague is being dishonest or trying to paint you in a negative light. While you may feel difficult to wait as you gather information, you will be far more effective when you present your case to the employer.

• Keep your reliable friends close to you and your enemies closer

It may sound counterintuitive, but an increased interaction with the peer is more helpful than less. The goal is to see if you can deescalate the tension so that you won’t end up wanting to bring in the big guns. By extending an olive branch, you may be able to solve problems on your own.

Getting to know a person will help you to build a bridge and convert the relationship. It is a lot harder to backstab someone you know about and like than a stranger.

• Enlist backup

You are not likely the only person that the backstabber has hurt. So, understand who you can trust and ask them to back you up. Workspace allies can also help you build your case to present to the management. So, consider meeting with trusted colleagues and coming up with a strategy to explain why and how the office troublemaker needs to get stopped.

Most importantly, never sink yourself to the level of the problem making person. And don’t lie or exaggerate about the issues, alone or as a group. Remember that the backstabber, however terrible, is a human. Neutralizing disputes is most successful if you can hang on to your empathy and honesty along the way.

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